Groom's Father; I like your daughter, she is all rounder. I must admit, my son also all rounder¡¬¡¬ except¡¬¡¬ when he laugh¡¬¡¬ looks like a Dracula because of long teeth.
Bride's Father; No problem, I guess, your son will not have much time to laugh after marriage.
Wife; Pls tell your friend not to marry Sunita coz she is like a dazzalni.
Husband; no way, he didn't tell me anything ¨C when I got married.
Sardarjee 1; Sorry to hear yaar, your wife left with the driver.
Sardarjee 2; don't worry ¨C I can drive.
Publisher; Your handwriting too bad, can't u type and bring your script.
Writer; If I knew typing ¨C I wouldn't be writing.
1st guardian; I need to see the dictionary to read my son's writing.
2nd guardian; u r lucky, I need to see the bank passbook.
In Panjab engineers planed to make a swimming complex including 3 swimming pools, 1 for cold water, 1 for hot water and another empty for non-swimmers.
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Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
IT humour free smile for the day
Smart Consultant
One day, three consultants, one from Wipro, one from Infosys and one from TCS, went out for a walk.
They were old buddies from Engg College, and they were together for a college reunion...
For no apparent reason, they went into this zoo and passed a monkey. Being in the same business and from the same college, there was a little bit of a peer competition going on between them - they couldn't resist testing themselves against each other.- especially the Infosys guy.
He said to the others: "Why don't we prove who is the best among ourselves?
" Why not, said the other two.
The Infoscion said "Let's have a test. Whoever makes this monkey laugh, works for the best firm".
By mutual agreement, the Infoscion took the first turn.
Being a pure logical strategist, the Infoscion tried to make the monkey laugh by telling jokes. The monkey stayed still.
As a more practical consultant, the Wipro guy tried to make funny gestures... no good, the monkey stayed put... Now, comes the TCS guy... being the practical guy he was always trained to be, he whispered something into the monkey's ear, and it burst out laughing at him.
The other two were astonished.
How did this TCS guy manage to beat them? No way were they going to accept defeat so easily.
So the Wipro guy said "OK, let's take another test. Let's make this monkey cry!!" So there they went again, applying the same methods as before.
The Infosys guy narrated sad stories, the Wipro guy made sad gestures, and they failed again...
Then, the TCS guy whispered something into the monkey's ear and lo! It started crying, patting the TCS er's shoulder!
The other two just could not believe their eyes!
So the Infoscion said "OK, you've won twice. If you can win just this one, we will bow to you. Let's make this monkey run".
And he barked at the monkey and ordered him to run. Of course, it stayed where it was.
The Wipro guy, true to his type, pushed and prodded the monkey- still no go.
So... here comes TCS guy, again, and whispers into the monkey's ear. The monkey just takes off! It runs and runs as fast as it can, as if it was scared to death!
The other two surrendered. Said they: "OK, we give up. You're the best among us, and you work for the Best firm of the three. But please, please tell us your secret," they begged him.
"Well", said the TCS
"The first time I made it laugh, I told I work for TCS.
The next time, I told the monkey how much I get paid...so it started crying.
And then I told that I was here for recruitment!!!
One day, three consultants, one from Wipro, one from Infosys and one from TCS, went out for a walk.
They were old buddies from Engg College, and they were together for a college reunion...
For no apparent reason, they went into this zoo and passed a monkey. Being in the same business and from the same college, there was a little bit of a peer competition going on between them - they couldn't resist testing themselves against each other.- especially the Infosys guy.
He said to the others: "Why don't we prove who is the best among ourselves?
" Why not, said the other two.
The Infoscion said "Let's have a test. Whoever makes this monkey laugh, works for the best firm".
By mutual agreement, the Infoscion took the first turn.
Being a pure logical strategist, the Infoscion tried to make the monkey laugh by telling jokes. The monkey stayed still.
As a more practical consultant, the Wipro guy tried to make funny gestures... no good, the monkey stayed put... Now, comes the TCS guy... being the practical guy he was always trained to be, he whispered something into the monkey's ear, and it burst out laughing at him.
The other two were astonished.
How did this TCS guy manage to beat them? No way were they going to accept defeat so easily.
So the Wipro guy said "OK, let's take another test. Let's make this monkey cry!!" So there they went again, applying the same methods as before.
The Infosys guy narrated sad stories, the Wipro guy made sad gestures, and they failed again...
Then, the TCS guy whispered something into the monkey's ear and lo! It started crying, patting the TCS er's shoulder!
The other two just could not believe their eyes!
So the Infoscion said "OK, you've won twice. If you can win just this one, we will bow to you. Let's make this monkey run".
And he barked at the monkey and ordered him to run. Of course, it stayed where it was.
The Wipro guy, true to his type, pushed and prodded the monkey- still no go.
So... here comes TCS guy, again, and whispers into the monkey's ear. The monkey just takes off! It runs and runs as fast as it can, as if it was scared to death!
The other two surrendered. Said they: "OK, we give up. You're the best among us, and you work for the Best firm of the three. But please, please tell us your secret," they begged him.
"Well", said the TCS
"The first time I made it laugh, I told I work for TCS.
The next time, I told the monkey how much I get paid...so it started crying.
And then I told that I was here for recruitment!!!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Wife and Husband Smile for the day
Free smile for the day http://freesmilefortheday.blogspot.com/
Wife; you said, u fall in love 2nd sight with me, why?
Husband; 1st time I didn't understand your father so rich.
Dieing Husband; After my death u will marry Roger.
Wife; but he is your enemy.
Husband; I know, I suffered a long time, now his turn.
Wife; I am Beautiful, which tense?
Husband; Past tense.
Wife; Definitely, I was fool, that's why I married u.
Husband; Is that so, I must be blind in love, didn't noticed that.
Wife; If I die, will u marry again?
Husband; no, take a rest for a month.
1st Friend; My wife is an angel.
2nd Friend; U r lucky, mine still alive.
Free smile for the day http://freesmilefortheday.blogspot.com/
Wife; you said, u fall in love 2nd sight with me, why?
Husband; 1st time I didn't understand your father so rich.
Dieing Husband; After my death u will marry Roger.
Wife; but he is your enemy.
Husband; I know, I suffered a long time, now his turn.
Wife; I am Beautiful, which tense?
Husband; Past tense.
Wife; Definitely, I was fool, that's why I married u.
Husband; Is that so, I must be blind in love, didn't noticed that.
Wife; If I die, will u marry again?
Husband; no, take a rest for a month.
1st Friend; My wife is an angel.
2nd Friend; U r lucky, mine still alive.
Free smile for the day http://freesmilefortheday.blogspot.com/
Saturday, October 11, 2008
A Blonde's New Job smile for the day
A blonde who had been unemployed for several months got a job with Public Works. She was to paint lines down the center of a rural road. The supervisor told her that she was on probation and that she must stay at or above the set average of two miles per day to remain employed. The blonde agreed to the conditions and started right away.
The supervisor checking up at the end of the day, found that the blonde had completed four miles on her first day, double the average! "Great," he told her, "I think you're really going to work out."
The next day, however, he was disappointed to find that the blonde only accomplished two miles. The supervisor thought, "Well she's still at the average and I don't want to discourage her, so I'll just keep quiet."
The third day however the blonde only did one mile and the boss thought, "I need to talk to her before this gets any worse." The boss pulled the new employee in and said, "You were doing so great. The first day you did four miles, the second day two miles, but yesterday you only did one mile. Why? Is there a problem? An injury, equipment failure? What's keeping you from meeting the two-mile minimum?"
The blonde replied "Well, each day I keep getting farther and farther away from the bucket."
The supervisor checking up at the end of the day, found that the blonde had completed four miles on her first day, double the average! "Great," he told her, "I think you're really going to work out."
The next day, however, he was disappointed to find that the blonde only accomplished two miles. The supervisor thought, "Well she's still at the average and I don't want to discourage her, so I'll just keep quiet."
The third day however the blonde only did one mile and the boss thought, "I need to talk to her before this gets any worse." The boss pulled the new employee in and said, "You were doing so great. The first day you did four miles, the second day two miles, but yesterday you only did one mile. Why? Is there a problem? An injury, equipment failure? What's keeping you from meeting the two-mile minimum?"
The blonde replied "Well, each day I keep getting farther and farther away from the bucket."
Friday, October 10, 2008
Types of Man Smile for the day
Types of Man. ..
Before Finding a Girl - Spiderman....
After Finding his Girl - Superman....
After the Engagement - Gentleman....
After the Marriage - Watchman....
10 years After Marriage -Doberman.
Before Finding a Girl - Spiderman....
After Finding his Girl - Superman....
After the Engagement - Gentleman....
After the Marriage - Watchman....
10 years After Marriage -Doberman.
Marriage and Love smile for the day
Love is holding hands in the street.
Marriage is holding arguments in the street.
Love is cuddling on a sofa.
Marriage is one of them sleeping on a sofa.
Love is talking about having children.
Marriage is talking about getting away from children.
Love is going to bed early.
Marriage is going to sleep early.
Love is losing your appetite.
Marriage is losing your figure.
Love is sweet nothing in the ear.
Marriage is sweet nothing in the bank.
Tv has no place in love.
Marriage is a fight for remote control.
Love is 1 drink and 2 straws.
Marriage is "Don't you think you've had enough!".
Conclusion: "Love is blind, Marriage is an eye opener!"
Marriage is holding arguments in the street.
Love is cuddling on a sofa.
Marriage is one of them sleeping on a sofa.
Love is talking about having children.
Marriage is talking about getting away from children.
Love is going to bed early.
Marriage is going to sleep early.
Love is losing your appetite.
Marriage is losing your figure.
Love is sweet nothing in the ear.
Marriage is sweet nothing in the bank.
Tv has no place in love.
Marriage is a fight for remote control.
Love is 1 drink and 2 straws.
Marriage is "Don't you think you've had enough!".
Conclusion: "Love is blind, Marriage is an eye opener!"
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
sardar testing free smile for the day
Sardar's theory : Moon is more impt than Sun, coz it gives light at night when light is needed
& Sun gives light during the day when light is not needed!!!
********************************************************************
sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the other to check whether its working,
He puts his head out and says YES...NO...YES. ..NO...YES. ..NO...
& Sun gives light during the day when light is not needed!!!
********************************************************************
sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the other to check whether its working,
He puts his head out and says YES...NO...YES. ..NO...YES. ..NO...
Sardar free smile of the day
Sardar at bar in New York.
Man on his right says "Johny Walker single"
Man on his left says "Peter Scotch single"
Sardar says - "Baljith Singh Married"
Man on his right says "Johny Walker single"
Man on his left says "Peter Scotch single"
Sardar says - "Baljith Singh Married"
Sardars Free smile for the day
Prince Charles & Sardarji were having dinner.
Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine".
Sardar thinks "how poetic"
Sardar says, "pass the custard you bastard".
Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine".
Sardar thinks "how poetic"
Sardar says, "pass the custard you bastard".
Chinese Detective Free smile for the day
A man suspected his wife was seeing another man, so he hired the famous Chinese detective, Chen Lee, to watch and report any activities while he was gone. A few days later he received this report:
Most Honorable Sir,
You leave house. I watch house. He comes to house. I watch he. He and She leave house. I follow. He and She go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss She. She kiss He. He strips She. She strips He. He play with She. She play with He. I play with me......... I fall off tree.
I no see.
No Fee
Chen Lee
Have a great weekend all
Most Honorable Sir,
You leave house. I watch house. He comes to house. I watch he. He and She leave house. I follow. He and She go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss She. She kiss He. He strips She. She strips He. He play with She. She play with He. I play with me......... I fall off tree.
I no see.
No Fee
Chen Lee
Have a great weekend all
IT professional smile for the day
Long back, a person who sacrificed his sleep, forgot his family, forgot his food, Forgot laughter were called
"Saints"
But now they are called.. " IT professionals "
"Saints"
But now they are called.. " IT professionals "
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